If
only I could put into words the huge ways that Jesus has been
transforming my heart in this season of my life. Sure, I could try my
best to explain it, but at the end of the day i would still feel
speechless. Lately, I have been challenged by the concept of words
and how much weight they can carry if they are not words that bring
life into a situation.
I
have been a victim for quite sometime of using words to describe
myself that are degrading, and simply not true. Instead of basking in
the freedom from holy spirit, and celebrating the joy of my gifts
that Jesus has given me, I developed a strange comfort in putting
myself down. But honestly, i'm over it. I declare truth over my life
in Jesus name and step into who I am authentically, With this change
of mindset, have come swarms of creativity and the understanding that
the talents I have been blessed with are not just for my own
enjoyment but to be used as a light for others. That Jesus uses my
gifts to inspire others in ways that I cannot comprehend. And I
praise him for that.
After sharing some of my poetry the other night with my dear friend Shannon, (*shout out to spirit sisters that spur you on*) she encouraged me to share them on my blog to fight against that spirit of negativity that I tend to put on myself with things that I write and just in general. I am posting this in hopes of it inspiring and bringing life
into peoples lives and not letting fear get the better of me this time, because that is not how I am called to live.
This poem I wrote in honor of all Women. It celebrates the femininity that I feel is often times too "shushed" in our society, too personal. Its about self discovery, and figuring out who we are as women, and what we long for. It is a part of my heart that wants all women to take joy in their bodies that Jesus has blessed us with. For us to see ourselves as flawless as our creator does, and not just see it, but believe that it is true.
-Woman-
She sits staring at her reflection in the mirror
Longingly and with gentle curiosity she gazes back into the eyes that are staring back at her
She sees what's on the inside, pieces of the young girl she once was..but she knows she is not that same girl now
No, not a bit.
"She is a Women", she whispers at her reflection
She gently grazes her fingers over her soft lips as she slowly brings them down to her neck
She turns her head ever so slightly, admonishing her features.
Her tousled hair, and rosy cheeks, her firm collar bone, her slender shoulders, and her full breasts that perch on her rib cage
She brings her hand to her stomach and laughs amidst a sigh
"Funny,.." She says "They keep telling women to be as small as little girls, but you'd think they knew we have outgrow that body type?"
She comes to her thighs, strong and firm. "I could never be in any magazines by today's standards" she pauses.."but that's ok..I wouldn't dream of living by those standards, because they do not line up with reality"
She comes to her ankles, her feet, not necessarily dainty, but she loves how unique and feminine they are.
Laying outstretched on her bed, bare, and natural. She tosses her hair and and takes a deep breath
"I am a women," she says " I am strong but feminine, confident but gentle, powerful but subtle, and lovely always. I am a women, built to carry future generations and carry on the truth to all women, to never be ashamed of your body, to never be ashamed of how you are built because that makes you exactly what you are.
Her eye lids become heavy, she falls asleep content with her discovery that a child no longer lives inside her, but a woman, fully embraced by her femininity. That's what she truly longed for after all, she just never knew it until she saw her self for what she truly was, beautiful.
